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2014.02.14 03:24 CapitalistDog Rocket League

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2017.11.15 11:40 JustShorm TheStressBall

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2014.10.21 00:27 prendligost Dragon Ball Z: Kakarot

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2023.02.03 04:58 ThrowndAway0 Advice concerning a previous relationship post

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. : Advice (reddit.com)
I am the husband. I know what I did was wrong. I wish that I had not done it. I had my issues, and I learned from these experiences. I am sure that this will be down voted and destroyed in the comments, but if you would, please take a minute to understand my perspective, you can always get on with it afterward.
I wish that I had not done this because of the stigma that has persisted throughout our relationship and the critical damage to its foundation. However, I am glad that I did it. I love her. She has been the most important person in my life, until she blessed me with two beautiful children. I would only change meeting her later.
I would hope that anyone, some have, who read her post realized that I am likely not as bad as made out to be. I definitely fucked up, but I am not this caricature. I am not running around grooming. We have been together for 12 years, married for 4 years. I have been devoted to her. I have been devoted to her even when she has not been devoted to me. I am not the only authority figure that she has pursued. I did not know that was what was going on, I thought I was the luckiest man. No, it’s so much more. I did not realize that she had this issue. Believe me, it is heartbreaking to learn that your person simply has a thing for authority figures rather than you. To all of the women commenting on how women are more than their looks, I totally agree with you. I thought we had more of a connection than my title. So, yeah, we need therapy, not because of her beliefs, but because we obviously have issues to work through.
I suggest counseling because WE need it, both of us. I don’t suggest this every time that she discusses our kids or expresses herself, I suggest it every time I see the wounds that she clearly carries. If we are discussing raising our children, and she is only able to focus on bad things that men might do, then that seems like a trigger and likely an area for counseling. I was not demeaning her, she had an emotional response that outweighed the topic. I thought it was appropriate to show her that I support her. Also, if being hugged and receiving emotional support is triggering, then there is likely an issue that needs to be resolved by counseling. Right? Isn't that the definition of a trigger? Even more frustrating, this is the advice that I have received from various sources when someone is feeling triggered. Show the person that they are supported. So, imagine, I am seeing my wife struggling internally from what seems to be a trigger and reach out to comfort her, but, in the post, I was tapping her on her head. Even reading her last comment on this post, she discusses her issue. The one that she obviously projects.
We have two children and the best hope they have is if we are together, emotionally strong, and able to maintain stability in the home. I have arranged counseling multiple times. Do you knowhow hard it was during COVID to find appointments, let alone try to find a specific therapist that I could control (as has been suggested in some comments)? I felt lucky to find one with availability, and even the one that I found was a referral from another practice that had no availability. We have gone together. I have gone by myself. She has gone by herself. We both decided that the previous counselor was ill-equipped to help us with our situation, so we decided to find a new one. Now, she finds every excuse to not go. I have scheduled multiple appointments and then had to cancel them because she has refused to go. These people lost time and money because of this. I have asked her multiple times to find a therapist that she prefers, she just won’t do it. Because I am being accused of purposely picking a counselor that agrees with me, I am adding that I have never met any of the counselors that we have seen before our first session.
So, in the meantime, I learn as much as I can about relationships, attachment styles, and development on my own. I pass on books, articles, and videos to her, but she won’t look at them. I have even gone to a marital relationship conference centered on love languages, she refused to read the extra copy of the book that I grabbed at the conference for her. When she suggested a book, I finished it in 3 days. The book was Fairplay, so not a totally unbiased book, but I plowed through it anyway because she wanted it. We never ended up discussing it. I printed out the cards, cut them out, and gave them to her. We never had a meeting, we never divided them up. The cards just sit in a drawer now. This was her suggestion, I did most of the work, then nothing. Do I set up the meeting too? Am I controlling if I do? At this point, I am controlling if I seek out help, or I am manipulative and gaslighting if I do not.
I do not think that my daughter just needs to look good fora man or that that is the most important thing to a man. I also never sexualized her. The fact that my wife is making this all about that subject also tells me that there is something there for counseling. Of course, I can only guess with the available information because she will not talk about it. So, again, we need to go to counseling, and we need to talk about these issues. That is not even close to what I was saying. I was saying that our children will likely marry someday (even if gay, I believe that everyone should be allowed to marry who they please) and that I want that spouse to be the best match. My daughter is very precious to me, and I want the person that marries her to feel the same way. I feel like this about both my children. Their happiness is my top concern. I need their partners to care for them because I will not be around forever.
Rather than pretending that life just works out and that hopefully my kids meet good people, I am suggesting that we attempt to envision the type of person that we see embodying the values that we feel are good. Then, we ensure that our children are raised with good values, possess the awareness to see those values, and present in a way that draws those of good values to them. If I do not teach my daughter what a good man is (regardless if I am or not), then we are abandoning her. All this talk about finding the one sounds great, but what are we actually going to do to help them? When our kids ask for help navigating this world, they need guidance, not just fairy tales.
None of this excludes the other aspects of finding a suitable partner. I have noticed multiple jumps in assumptions. Because I mentioned one aspect of relational dynamics does not mean that all other aspects are not taken into consideration or that I only believe in one aspect alone. Attractiveness is one aspect of a person that is taken into consideration when dating or finding your partner. We both have values that we hope the spouses of our kids will have, and our kids will add their preferences as well. People are multidimensional and nuanced, this all or nothing (binary) thinking is very toxic and unproductive.
Part of my reasoning even lines up with the experiences that my wife has had. The duties of a stay at home mothewife (SAHM) have been very overwhelming for her. I believe it is because she was not taught to properly manage a home, family, or marriage, and it was not modeled for her growing up. So, she is learning on the job. Anyone ever worked at a job that you were not qualified for? That is rough. My suggestion was that, if my daughter would like to be a SAHM, then we should teach her and model the behavior the best that we can. Is it wrong to attempt to prepare our children for possible futures? For those that are immediately embracing the victim narrative and just waiting to say that my son should have to learn those things too, I AGREE. It is our responsibility to prepare our children the best that we can before they go out into the world.
Many seem to think that this happened in a vacuum. It did not. Both of our families have known about us for most of our relationship. She has discussed all this with her family, it has not been hidden from them. I have personal relationships and interact with them often, as she does with my family. In fact, I have paid for her and her mother’s cell phones by adding them to my plan for the last 12 years because I know how important her mother is to her. I want her to have relationships with her family. I have even paid for multiple flights for her family to ensure that she is able to see them. I have made this a priority because these relationships are important to her.
We have gone to countless family events on both sides. I proposed when and where I did so that the vast majority of our family would be there and see it. (That’s right, I proposed to her, on my knee, with a custom ring, made specifically for her, and she accepted. No controlling or forcing her to do things.) We have been at each other’s graduations and been involved in ceremonies celebrating one another’s achievements. We are in each other’s family photos. One of her nephews does not have a man in the house and has looked to me since he was born for a relationship, and I have done my best for close to a decade to be there for him. Last year I was playing CoC with several of her nieces and nephews. Because her father is not around, I took her and her mom out to dinner so that I could ask her mom to marry her. We even discussed the ring, and I told her all about the design. We are currently planning two different family events already this year. Or you know, I am a terrible monster.
I am not trying to control her. She is a SAHM now, but she had her own job up until we got pregnant with our first kid. We are not in this situation because I am trying to control her. We decided this was best for our family. She was passionate about taking care of our kids. This is one of the reasons that love her. I am thinking that I have found the jackpot. She is intelligent, beautiful, and wants to care for our children. We literally made the decision together to get pregnant because I was taking a higher paying job, and she would not have to work. She was on the pill, I didn’t make her stop taking them. This was our plan, but now somehow I am misogynist because she is a SAHM and I work. She tells me that she is glad that our kids get to stay home with her, and that she will always hold these memories dear, but then has a bad day and blames me for trapping her in the house.
For those that are concerned that I am somehow not letting her raise the kids, I am at my jobs about 60 hours a week on average and am about to pick up another that will put me up to 80 hours a week out. I hate it and want to see my kids more, but I know that I have to do this for them, for our future, and to afford the help that we need (counseling is not cheap). I, at no time before the new position, thought that I would even be able to afford to let her stay at home. I was never intent on her not being able to be free to do her own thing. I supported her at university and when pursuing her jobs/career. I even went to work on my Master’s so that we could go to university together. One of my favorite aspects of her is how intelligent she is. I often brag to people that she was able to get a perfect grade on an extremely difficult, well known test at the university. It was amazing. I know no one else that has done it.
I am on the left side of politics, more so than she. I not only support equality of all, I have voted that way many times. I am not the caricature right-wing traditionalist man. I am also not a homophobe, I have also voted in favor of this group every time that I have had the opportunity. Many of the liberal perspectives that she is espousing above, I introduced to her. I have no problems if anyone is gay, let alone my kids. I love my kids unconditionally, no matter what happens in life.
Geriatric pregnancy is after 35. That is a verifiable fact. Pregnancies become more problematic and dangerous for both the mother and baby after that age. To not acknowledge that would be risky for my daughter, and any woman. So, yes, if I was giving my advice, it would be to have babies at a younger age because I love my daughter, and her wellbeing, as well as that of my grandchildren, is paramount. Women do the exhausting and magical work of creating a baby, but, in this instance, some are commenting like it is not. Which is it? You do not get it both ways. Does it take a toll on your body or not?
Another one of my radical science/historical views is that I am expendable. Men grew shoulders, women grew hips. When danger comes, I stand in the way and possibly don’t make it. I go to war. I expect that my wife would take our kids, run, and keep them alive. One is no more important than the other. Both of these roles are necessary. Just like I took the COVID vaccine long before my family did. I drive in the snow. I do the risky thing. This is based on our biology. I can’t breastfeed, and she is not as strong as me, so what should we do? Should we reverse the roles and do the thing that we are less suited for? I should let her take the risk and possibly compromise our children’s development? Switch them to formula and pretend it is as healthy as the nutrients she provides them? I didn’t pick this, I am looking at what has worked in the past and making the best decision I can for my family. She also has no problem with this on a regular basis. She prefers that I do these things, except when discussing these things. She has even attempted to shame me for not being man enough when it comes to mowing, working on the car, taking out the trash, etc.
This is how her comment portrays what I mean:
And he will say you can be as upset as you want, but they are facts and have been since the beginning of time. He even referenced a statue of a mammoth and a man fighting it with his wife and baby behind him. Woman looks good, man chooses woman, man protects woman from mammoth.
https://www.reddit.com/Advice/comments/10dsvrj/comment/j4nk6tq/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
She literally describes it and then focuses on "Woman looks good...," which has nothing to do with the example. "...with his wife and baby behind him."
I guess I was grooming her by taking her on dates, buying her things, and spending time with her. Enough that I was able to get her to live with me, in our apartment, then later a house. I was grooming her when she wrecked her car, and I was the only one to come to her aid, let her borrow my car, and then buy her a new one (not easy to do for a teacher). Then continued this grooming until I asked her to marry me, and luckily that grooming made her say yes in front of both our families. Then groomed her further by taking amore lucrative job, which allowed her to stay home while pregnant and with the kids, her preference. Then groomed her further by buying our dream house. Then I controlled and groomed her further by ensuring that her name was on the title of the house and car and that she was the beneficiary if anything were to happen to me. Guess what?! I even have future schemes of sending our kids to college. Then, hopefully, I can carry out the ultimate diabolical plan and ensure that we have a retirement and grow old together. In addition, did anyone, for a second, consider how the fallout of all this looked? You respond like I snatched her up against her will and ran off. No. I knew that when we announced this, I would lose credibility, friends, colleagues, and my career would take a serious hit. Guess what? I still chose it. Do you think that I had no idea about the fallout? I chose her over all those things. I accepted those painful consequences because I invested in her and our relationship. She was worth it in my mind. Why would I out myself if I intended to continue that behavior? I have not tried to keep this quiet so that I can take advantage of others, I committed, publicly.
As some have mentioned, this can’t be real. You’re right. It is not. Some have had trouble reconciling the original post with her comments. You are right. You are picking up on the cognitive dissonance. From what I can tell this is called splitting, I am all bad or all good, but not both at the same time. Both versions are misrepresentations of me and our relationship. There are numerous examples of this in our relationship. I was the best driver she had ever seen, now I am the worst, her grandmother only trusts me driving her car. I was the nicest guy to those in the drive through, now I am the worst. We used to discuss history, now history is a waste of time. Doesn’t make much sense does it? She even slipped up when people have said to leave, and she mentioned her lifestyle. Well that doesn’t seem to track, does it. But also remember the original post, women do not look to men for their resources. Back and forth, up and down. Wanted to be a SAHM, now she is trapped. Hated working, now can't wait to work. We make these decisions together, but then she seemingly changes her mind. Then, everything is my fault when she switches. For those of you thinking that we should have sorted out parenting and value systems before getting married, we did. We are doing exactly that, she has changed her mind again.
But this is where the maladaptive patterns take the most hold. This is the most dangerous space. Once the façade is damaged, she rages. I remember when she was complaining that I do not clean enough around the house. I even had more time off because of COVID, not enough. At one point I noticed that my steam total game time, for a time, was a half hour and my screen time on my phone marked 2 hours a day, basically sitting on the toilet and driving. Then I checked her screen time. It was regularly between 10 and 14 hours a day, not an over exaggeration. I pointed this out, and she raged harder than I had ever seen before that time.
Some weeks later, same argument, I asked to see her screen time. It had been turned off. I asked her why. Because she did not care about that. I asked again why someone would turn off the tool that tracks that information. She raged again and hit me, multiple times. Balled up fists in the face. Some have commented on the possibility of me becoming violent. It is the opposite. She has hit me on numerous occasions. In fact, she hit me two days before this post because I disagreed with her, in front of the kids even. At least I got to have sex that night. On that note, for those that are implying I have some sort of sex problem, we had sex 5 times last year and 4 times the year before that. That is less than half the amount of times some professionals consider a sexless marriage. Shout out to deadbedrooms. See, they can do it when it is beneficial. I have not cheated, I have not left her, I have not treated her poorly for it. I sought help. Again, I am suggesting counseling because that is not normal, none of this is normal. We need a professional.
Instead of reading, writing, learning, or building our relationship; she scrolls reddit. She sends me posts every few days from various subreddits where women are complaining about their husbands. Twoxchromosomes was the subreddit I spent most time in, according to my year in review for2021. I don’t know what hers was because she changes/deletes/creates her various reddit handles so quickly that many times there is not a year in review. I had never seen the handle for this post until she shared this with me. Why does someone need 15-20 reddit handles? The time stamps for some of her comments are when she is sitting on the couch instead of playing with me and the kids or watching a family movie. I mean 8:30 p.m. on a Monday night. We are doing typical family stuff while she trashes me online.
I have done so much to heal our relationship, and, in that time, she has chosen to go to social media to extract validation and search for those that can prop up her maladaptive coping strategies. She purposely misleads all of you so that you can give her validation and so that she can triangulate me. I have thought about leaving many times, but it is not in the best interest of my kids, and she will still struggle with her issues regardless of if she is with me. I feel comfortable exposing this vulnerability because she already leverages me by using the children. She has even threatened me with how the court systems favor the mother. For those of you telling her to leave, she can. I don't know how I would be keeping her from leaving. The point of this was not to take your advice, which is why she is not. The purpose is to manipulate me. She has stated this in her comments. She wants to show this to me so that I change my mind and purposefully misrepresented almost all of the post to that end. How could one even get accurate advice if not sharing honestly? This is just this month’s post from whichever reddit account she has going now. This is the therapy she has chosen. This is also why we can't move past our issues. Once reality does not reflect her feelings, she goes to social media, changes the story, and soaks up the validation. Then, bonus, she will turn around and tell me that everyone agrees with her, conveniently leaving out the part about mischaracterizing the event/s. No nuanced discussion, no cobbling together a new theory from two different ones; just make statements, yell louder than me, implement defenses, misrepresent online, no need to be wrong or compromise, shame me, update narrative & facade, repeat.
The part that truly hurts the worst is that I risked everything because of my faith in her, I wanted to be with her. I chose her because I thought she was amazing. She told me she was amazing. I saw a woman who came from a very impoverished area and overcame that, a woman who worked hard despite that, a woman who was academically successful, a woman who cared about her family, a woman who was bright and vibrant, and a woman who was beautiful. Yeah murder me because I mentioned that I think she is beautiful, what a terrible person. I can’t even try to be chivalrous anymore because opening a damn door is like an attack on her ability to open her own door. Such a misogynist. But hey, I made a huge mistake 12 years ago so maybe I deserve to be lied to, emotionally and physically abused, and destroyed socially. Maybe I will even die earlier from the prolonged stress. Would that make up for it?
So, you think we should nuke our family? You think that our kids are better off watching mommy emotionally and physically abuse daddy or should they spend some time in a chaotic household and then some time in a stable one? What should I do? Should I just off myself because I fucked up 12years ago? Just abandon my kids. Maybe another broken household is the right answer. Yeah, take them out of their nice home and send them to an impoverished community. They will be fine. Those places always have great education, right? I am sure the water is safe to drink, right? Burn me at the stake, maybe my kids can watch.
I know I did a terrible thing, I am trying to make up for it every day. My inclination is to get better every day. I would like for my wife to join me instead of wasting so much valuable time on unhealthy behaviors. There is no way in hell, I am going to face my kids and tell them that I decided to quit on them because I was a victim. That I abandoned them because others refuse to heal, deal with, or put their own shit aside for the betterment of their children and instead choose to be a victim and therefore never be held responsible for anything. I will not let the traumas passed down for generations pass to my kids, these abuse cycles will stop with me.
TLDR; I disagree with the mischaracterization of the argument. Now what?
submitted by ThrowndAway0 to Advice [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 04:43 foggycsea [A4A] You Will Be The Death Of Me [Royal Masquerade Ball][Tsundere Speaker][Enemies to Lovers][Childhood Bully(?)/Best Friend To Lovers][Arranged Marriage][Dorky Frustration][Late Night Garden Adventure][Rolling Down A Hill][Reverse Pinning]

Synopsis: At tonight’s ball you run into a familiar face you haven’t seen in years, your childhood friend you used to tease; and they're not happy about it. Although pressured into a marriage to combine your kingdom’s powers, the two of you escape from responsibilities just for tonight as if you are kids again. (Who started playing Ribs by Lorde???)(1700 words)
Important Notes: Feel free to change or make additions to small aspects of this work such as the tags, pronouns, title, etc.! VA goes by SPEAKER and the listener is LISTENER. LISTENER responses are “...”.
Fun fact, the original title was going to be "I'll Kill You In Your Sleep," but later on I realized it didn't fit the overall tone lol.
You Will Be The Death Of Me
Monetization is okay, just be sure to see my Terms of Use
Script List

FADE IN

INT. BALLROOM- EVENING.
As the music ensemble continues performing in the background, the speaker approaches the listener with their charismatic persona.

SPEAKER
It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I’m glad we were properly introduced by our parents, otherwise, I’m not sure I would have had the courage to talk to you. I noticed you chatting up with the others so freely, I can infer that you knew them beforehand, or perhaps it’s just your bountiful charm. You've certainly caught my attention nonetheless, may I have this dance?

The two walk onto the dance floor.

SPEAKER
I suppose we have a lot to cover considering our arrangement. I've never been fond of the idea of an arranged marriage, but I'm grateful to at least be familiar with you beforehand-
(bittedisgusted)
You! You. You. How did I not realize? Well, it's probably because of that stupid mask. And the fact that your royal title sounds a lot more tolerable than you ever were.

[...]

SPEAKER
I know you're toying with me. Sure we were only about ten at the time but that summer your family spent at our palace was miserable. No offense to your parents, just to you, who by the way, are looking in our direction. Just dance with me.

[...]

SPEAKER
Oh, I will go into detail. While I was trying to grow accustomed to royal duties, watching from afar how my parents handled the meetings held with yours, you'd sneak in with pastries you stole from the kitchen. Then you wouldn't stop pestering me and poking fun at me for being "too serious" and then shove a pastry in my mouth.

[...]

SPEAKER
Don't remember? I can go on forever. Ah, this will certainly ring a bell. You kept using me as your unwilling sparring partner, going on about how you want to be the head of your own royal guard. I told you it wasn't practical and then you jabbed me with your training sword! That bruise took a whole week to heal, you know!
(pause)
Now I know you remember because of that reaction.

[...]

SPEAKER
Yes. I hated you and your stupid little ambition of being both a royal and head of the royal guard. Hmm… I see you've been continuing your training since you're light on your feet.

[...]

SPEAKER
It doesn't matter how many classes I've taken, I'm not precisely exquisite at dancing. Why are you looking at me like that?
(pause)
Don't pick up the pace!

[...]

SPEAKER
Hanging onto you tighter isn’t going to make any of this better. Stop already. You're going to make me trip. My parents are looking now. Slow down. Just smile.
(through clenched teeth)
Yay, we are having so much fun. Hold me closer. Just do it. So much fun.
(normal)
Alright, I think we've had enough dancing. Let's head over to the refreshments table.

They walk over.

SPEAKER
What a coincidence, they have your favorite pastries. The ones you used to shove into my mouth to shut me up.

[...]

SPEAKER
How could I forget? Believe me, I still hold a grudge against you. Great, they're looking over again.
(under their breath)
Agh, think of something romantic. Right, I can feed one to you.

[...]

SPEAKER
What did you expect me to say?
(overdramatic, sarcastic)
Oh, I bullied you because I secretly had a big fat crush on you! Mmph!

The listener shoves the pastry into their mouth.

[...]

SPEAKER
(after swallowing)
Yes, it tastes good, better than I remember. And now they're laughing. Thank you for this wonderful night of disappointment and humiliation. I've had enough of you. I need some air.

TIME JUMP

EXT- PALACE GARDEN- NIGHT.
(SFX. night ambiance, crickets, etc.)
In the middle of sulking, the speaker notices the listener coming over.

SPEAKER
Oh. It's you. What did I expect? Annoyingly persistent as I remember. Honestly, at the rate this is going, if I'm forced to marry you I'll kill you in your sleep.

[...]

SPEAKER
Fine, you do have more training. Kill me in your sleep. I mean- kill me while I sleep.
(sigh)
Just end me. I'm sure you'll find a way anyways.

[...]

SPEAKER
Why wouldn't I be mad? I've never been in such a flurry of emotions and dragged around and- this isn't what I'm used to. It's just like we remember. I'm the stiff serious one and you're rowdy and restless.

Long silence.

SPEAKER
You know, it was pretty dull before we started talking. I mean, it was obvious how my whole attitude changed before I knew it was you and then after. It's like my entire persona crumbled because of you. Don't get me wrong, I'm still upset.

[...]

SPEAKER
Well, I wouldn't consider it a facade, it's just how I prefer to carry myself. I'll take my mask off, we're alone anyways.
(pause)
You don't have to take yours off. I just- oh. You're- you look different.

[...]

SPEAKER
(slightly embarrassed)
I don't think I changed that much.

[...]

SPEAKER
Oh. Well, thank you. You look lovely as well.

[...]

SPEAKER
I am not just saying that to be nice. I’m… being honest.
(pause)
This feels so nostalgic. I’ve been alone out here at night countless times, but it’s not the same as when we were younger and staying up way past our bedtimes. I kept telling you I saw shadows in the bushes and you would just stand in front of me, declaring that you’d protect me. Then the leaves would rustle and I would grab your hand and run. Except I was too busy freaking out so I tripped and slid into the mud. Then we both got into a lot of trouble. It’s silly but… just the little moments like that are memories I will cherish forever. The world seemed so much more vibrant and alive when we were younger but it has all become dull to me now. Perhaps it’s the reality of growing up, preparing to inherit a kingdom or the overlying stress of meeting expectations.

[...]

SPEAKER
It only makes sense that you feel that stress as well. Go on.

[...]

SPEAKER
I see. Well, I don’t think your bright aura is a complete act. Sure you were a bit shy in the past, but you were always the determined type. I’m glad to see you hold yourself with more confidence even if you’re secretly anxious all of the time. You bringing in that bright aura honestly brought more light into the palace. It’s most likely the memories we had together, but I’m grateful for it still.

[...]

SPEAKER
(dramatic)
Oh really? I don’t think I am in need of protection, but by all means, save me heir to the kingdom and head of the royal guard!

[...]

SPEAKER
Alright, I’m coming, I'm coming. What are we going to do, finally investigate those bushes?
(pause)
Agh! Not to sound like a stick in the mud but we really shouldn’t be running! Neither of us is dressed appropriately. Please don’t tell me you’re taking us to…

(SFX. footsteps fading out)
TIME JUMP

SPEAKER
Yes, yes. Let me just catch my breath. I didn’t think you’d remember since it’s been so long. The hill looks much smaller now. But, the ballroom still looks so far away from here. Even if we’re not that far, just the contrast makes the night sky and lights make it seem like a bubble. Like all of the stress is in its own world for now.
(teasing)
As of right now, I’m stuck with you.

[...]

SPEAKER
I’ll gladly shove you off, but is it really a good idea to ruin your attire? Do I even need to ask? It isn’t. Roll down a hill on your own time- agh!

(SFX. what sound does pummeling down a hill with soft grass make?)

SPEAKER
(laughing)
Oh gosh, that’s going to hurt in the morning. Are you alright?

[...]

SPEAKER
(concerned)
Really? Let me see.

They shuffle closer.

SPEAKER
You liar. Don’t scare me like that!

Long silence. The speaker sighs.

[...]

SPEAKER
It’s not a big deal, I didn’t really like this outfit that much anyways. It’s very constricting. We can just lay here for a while.

Long silence.

SPEAKER
Look, we don’t have to do this. I know our… marriage… is supposed to be arranged but our parents aren’t ruthless. Well, I know mine aren’t at least.
(pretending to be serious)
As long as I formulate my words to the utmost perfection…
(sighing, normal)
I can basically explain how this decision isn’t a good idea. I can continue acting as their perfect well-spoken heir and tell them that there is another way to unite kingdoms. There really doesn’t need to be any of this at all.

[...]

SPEAKER
Huh? I mean, neither of us wanted this in the first place, right? I’m not saying I wouldn’t want to marry you. I mean- I just…

[...]

SPEAKER
No, no! I do. I mean, I would like to be with you… if you’d like that too of course.

[...]

SPEAKER
Well, how do you want me to ask? Did you want me to bring out all of my charm or something? As if you could do better- why are you getting down on one knee?

[...]

SPEAKER
…wow. I mean. Yes, I’d love to court you. Here, I’ll get on one knee as well.
(pause)
We’ve only spent time together in the past and tonight, but I feel like you know me better than anyone, and that I can truly be myself with you. Even if the world seems daunting, I think we could do anything together. Can I have the honor of having your hand and being by your side, as both my best friend and more?

[...]

SPEAKER
(chuckling)
I'm glad.

They kiss.

SPEAKER
(teasing)
I guess I did bully you because I liked you. Just a little though.

The listener pushes them onto the grass.

SPEAKER
Did you learn this in training too? If you wanted to kiss me more you don’t have to pin me down like this.

[...]

SPEAKER
I missed you too.

They kiss some more.

SPEAKER
(chuckling)
Look at us, just some idiots on the grass. It doesn't matter whether you kill me in my sleep or not, I know you will be the death of me.

FADE OUT
Thank you for reading/ considering using my work! (๑′ᴗ‵๑)
The new puss in boots movie is overrated and I didn't really like it.
submitted by foggycsea to ASMRScriptHaven [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 04:42 ChaoticNeutGeauxTide Advice on how to go about talking with my family about not wanting children

I (25f) came to the realization I didn’t want children about a year ago. Many things factor into this decision but the largest are: - I have a ridiculous amount of student loans and no desire to juggle child care on top of them - I have been blessed with an incredibly large non-nuclear family which unfortunately means I’ve dealt with a lot of loss in the family. I fear my loved ones dying constantly (going to therapy for this) and know I would be a stress ball of a mother - I just don’t particularly want children, growing up I always said things about having them but I’m realizing that was only because I understood it to be something people with uteri did
I semi-recently entered the most serious relationship I’ve ever been in (2 years and v healthy) and introduced my partner (25m) to my family. I’ve never introduced a partner before this one. This led to a conversation with my mother where she brought up grandchildren for the first time with me. I expressed to her that I had no desire to have children and she went on a rant about how great I am with my various cousins children. I told her I love children but not for myself. She looked like I had just told her I wished she was dead and we didn’t speak of it.
She called me a few months later questioning if I had been influenced by my partner to come to this decision. In truth, he was always riding the fence on the topic and has stated he’s happy with whatever I want. She sounded on the brink of tears so I backtracked and told her he had nothing to do with it and I was just worried about the finances of it and she said she’d help. For context, my mom is planning on retiring and leaving the country shortly so I’m not sure how she’d be planning on helping anyway.
I’ve always been outspoken and strong in my opinions so I will not by any means be persuaded into doing something I’m adamantly against. I had planned to pretend to struggle with infertility and satiate my family with “we’re trying” in response to any questions while staying on birth control. I’d hoped over time they’d just feel sorry and stopped asking. A wrench was thrown in the works the other day. While on a phone call with a cousin (38f) she asked how I could say something like that to my mother. I’m easily baited into arguments so I went on about why everyone was trying to force me into something I don’t want to do. She called me selfish and I know she’s going to bring it up with my mother.
I haven’t visited home in a few months but I know the next time I do the conversation will be had. Does anyone have any good pointers on how to proceed with a conversation like this with boomer parents?
submitted by ChaoticNeutGeauxTide to JUSTNOFAMILY [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 04:38 ask4helpreddit I am nearly going insane because of my job

Nearly lost my mind completely because of my job. I wont go into detail but it was horrible.
My mental health has been deteriorating extremely quickly from the stress of my job. I hate my current job plain and simple. Not just dislike but HATE.
Its a factory job similar to Amazon warehouse work. I have ADHD so I cant stand jobs like that. I think about how long the hours of work are, how repetitive and boring it is, how hours of my life are being wasted doing mundane work that I hate from the bottom of my heart. Most people don't care and tell me I need to keep doing it for the money or threaten me with homelessness but I'm reaching my limit here. That advice doesnt work anymore. Neither does therapy, hobbies or anything else either. My job is making me hate my life. I wish I could turn back time to a happier moment in my life and avoid this shit job.
At this point if I keep doing it I will not be able to live let alone work.
I'm asking for help one last time before I lose my fucking mind. What should I do to get out of this line of work? I'm tired of the low pay, long work hours and zero future prospects.
I'm in my late 20s, can't enroll in the military or learn a trade.
submitted by ask4helpreddit to findapath [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 04:30 No_Tough_2137 I'm a disappointment

When you think of a 14 what comes to mind? Probably a kid with a lolipop and propeller hat in a colorful shirt going to school with a big smile on his face, right? You don't think of a 14 year as a kid that has gotten kicked out of 2 schools, trying pot, saying slurs and other awful things. Well that's me. I'm that kid, and I hate it.
I've had a very nice life growing up so far. I was a happy young boy with a loud mouth and was always happy. Small arguments here and there with me saying the occasional curse word or whatever. However this gotten only worse as time went on and starting from 8th things went downhill very quick. I was getting into trouble with girls and what not cause I wanted a girlfriend really bad and so bad in fact when my online friend bought his friend who was a girl and said she liked me I instantly said yes (I've only known her for a few days and she said she liked me) so being a r word I am I said yes but I was hesitant about edating but I gave it a shot. She broke up after 2 weeks (of course) I was still obsessed and wanted her back and she was playing mind games with me and gas lighting and when I did talk to her in a call she was being mean and calling me a "rich asshole" when I asked what trunk or treat was. This abuse and obsessiveness carried on into my new high school (All of this crap with edating happened over the summer) so I went into my new private high school with her still on my mind and boy. Was I wrong. After my parents found out about the thing they smashed my phone so I had no way of using my phone or the internet. I was still in search for a gf after moving on and I was trying way to hard and I was made out to be a creep and was promptly kicked out of the school since no one liked me there and I was constantly getting in trouble over stupid crap and I was deemed as a threat even though other kids were bullying me even outside of the school and still are. Fast foward now I'm at public school with my old friends. My friend (lets call him Jeb) had a lot of drugs and me being curious I wanted to try some with him. Also when I came back I got a job and was fried from that because I tried to take some cash from the register since I was in debt to someone. I returned the money and they didn't even know it was gone until I said something. I then bought herbal cigs off amazon and wanted to try them with my friend afterschool. was called up as a suspect since there was graffiti on the wall which I didn't do and they checked my bag and found that along with a lighter. I told them (principals) it was for stress and anxiety and reasoned with them and 2 days In school suspension. I then did mushrooms with my friend so I could try the experience at wrestling practice and it was... something. I feel asleep then laughed then cried all for 45 mins straight. Now we get into this week what happened with me going to therapy and being a genius I am I decided to try weed with my friend since he offered it to me. I smoked it and it stank and smelled to everyone but me. Principals pulled me aside because of my smell and then got 5 day OSS for being under the influence on school grounds. My grades are equally as bad with my behavior and I'm doing an anti-drug program at my school which I have to present a PSA to a bunch of middle schoolers next week. I think I'm so mature when really I'm just a dumb 14 year old. I don't want to do weed again but I want a job and my mom won't allow me and I got really pissed and was cursing and was being an ungrateful asshole to her a couple of hours ago after therapy when I asked her if I can go back this week. I hate myself for everything and I used to go through a self harm stage where I was sent to a suicide center for evaluation and I came back as normal... I guess. My mom does everything for me and I'm so ungrateful I don't take it into consideration. I'm sorry if my story is all over the place I'm tried and I hate myself for everything even though I just gave my dad a new beanie I bought with my own money. I am no better then an evil son.
submitted by No_Tough_2137 to offmychest [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 04:12 Moisty-Mangus These things helped me. Would recommend to anyone who suffers with Misophonia!

submitted by Moisty-Mangus to misophonia [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 03:15 Thisuhway23 All millennials in their 30s should be getting colonoscopies

I’m really worried for our generation. I’m 27, about to be 28, and had a colonoscopy done due to symptoms I had and anxiety over them. Incidentally, they did find a polyp that was an adenoma (pre-cancerous). While of course, many polyps don’t develop into cancer, it really shocked me. There’s this common belief that young people don’t get polyps, but I consider myself fairly healthy, just need to manage my stress better.
I worry that because of computers, video games, poor diets/fast food, binge drinking, and even vaping, there are most likely many other polyps going unnoticed in otherwise healthy folks around my age. Idk, maybe I’m just trying to feel less like an odd ball, but part of me is worried that in 15-20 years, there’s going to be this explosion of issues from my peers that I may get to avoid a bit by being screened early.
But if we make it so that young people in their 30s must get colonoscopies…then that might save a lot.
Anyway, rant? Or summmary? Or whatever? Is done.
submitted by Thisuhway23 to colonoscopy [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:32 kawaiineutral This hernia is ruining me, I’ve had trouble with GI doctors listening, meeting with surgeon next week. Looking for advice on how to get my symptoms out and stress the severity.

I believe I was born with my hernia. I never connected the dots until a few weeks ago when I had a horrible flare up and my mind is absolutely blown.
When I was 13-17 I used to occasionally have bouts of intense stomach pain that came every night around midnight and would last until the morning. I’d usually know when they were coming because I had sulfur burps the morning leading up to the attacks. To this day those nights are the most painful experience of my life. It felt like my insides were twisting for hours. It took years to convince my mom to take me to a doctor. No one could figure it out until I had an endoscopy done at 17 and they found a small hernia. Doctor shrugged it off and sent me on my way, told me to eat healthy and lose five pounds.
I can NEVER recall a time when I was able to easily swallow a pill. I used to cry when I was a kid and had to take them because I hated the feeling of them being stuck in my throat and my parents always thought I was being dramatic. It’s gotten so bad to the point now where when I have to take my daily medications I spend the next several minutes gagging and wretching. It’s horrible and it’s having such an impact on me mentally. I have to take 5 medications in the morning and even when I tell my doctor they just shrug and tell me to take it with food and don’t listen that it doesn’t help.
I can also NEVER recall a time when when I was able to take a full breath. I have always struggled with yawning because I can’t suck in enough air to let it out. Asthma runs in my family so it was assumed I had it but inhalers have never helped.
I constantly live with a ball in my throat and chest. I’ve gotten so used to it at this point it’s just part of me. Some days it’s worse than others but very rarely do I not feel pressure in my chest of some sort. It’s always tight and my heart flutters sometimes, but this has always been written off as anxiety (I do have major anxiety and every time I have my blood pressure taken my heart rate is 110-120 for YEARS and every doctor assumes because I’m anxious from being there (my resting heart rate is a 99, and has always been)
Often times when I swallow too big of a bite of food it will struggle going down my throat and I feel a quick sharp pain in my abdomen(I believe where the hernia is located) and ill feel the pressure just sit there for a few minutes.
For as long as I can remember, I have had the appetite of a bird. This has been something my mom has made remarks about for as long as I can remember “oh I wish I could be like you and get that full that fast” or friends/partners comment on it as well. At this point I can only stomach a few bites of anything I eat, I am consuming less than 1000 per day and have lost 10 pounds in the last 3 months, which is a lot for a 5’2 woman. My stomach always has digested everything very slowly, and I believe it impacts the effects of medications I take.
I get very dizzy from getting up too fast, always have, I always assumed this happens to everyone.
I have been falling into a daily loop of taking my meds (Wellbutrin, adderall, lamictal, and now am on pepcid after ppis have not helped) and it creates a feeling of nausea. My adderall makes me thirsty so I drink a lot of water, which makes me MORE nauseous to where I can’t eat. Adderall and lamictal make my acid reflux worse, but my adhd is crippling and my impulse spending and 0 foresight for my future self will literally bankrupt me at this level in my life. I have a very high pressure high stress commission job in management and I can’t afford to stop taking the only thing that helps me manage my adhd. I try not taking it on days I’m off but then house chores pile up because I struggle with executive functioning and it puts a strain on my relationship.
Medication and lifestyle do. not. help. I gave up deadlifting and switched to peloton 5x a week for 45 minutes. I am a healthy weight. I avoid alcohol, tomatoes, dairy, and garlic which are my main triggers. I dont know what else to do. My current GI doctor does not care about my hernia. Last week he did a colonoscopy and upper endoscopy. Before he put me down I asked if he was going to look at my hernia and he said no. Results turned out mostly okay, he said my colon was irritated and diagnosed me with IBS and said my esophagus “didn’t look that bad” took 5 biopsies that I’ll have results for on Monday and mentioned MAYBE crohns or eosinophilic esophagitis. I’m devastated.
I want this thing GONE. I do not care about the risk, the potential to have a life is worth it. If I keep going on the way I am now, this will kill me. My GP referred me to a surgeon that I’m seeing next week. I’m afraid this is my only chance, I need to be taken seriously. How do I convey this in a way that I don’t come off as the emotional wreck that I am right now?
Thank you for reading, reading the posts in this subreddit has made me feel so much less alone.
submitted by kawaiineutral to HiatalHernia [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:16 mike275ms Can a racket’s grip size be reduced/shaved down? Babolat AeroPro Drive & General Racket Advice

Hello! Very happy to find & follow this subreddit as I’m getting back into the sport and seemingly can’t get enough court time to satisfy the itch.
Quick background. Started with lessons in 8th grade and played tennis in high school (mix of 2nd singles, 1st doubles). Only played club in college (great times) but sadly fell off a cliff of consistent play when getting in to my career. So before the past couple of months, I hadn’t played more than a dozen times in the past 7 years. For the past decade (maybe closer to 15 years) I’ve had two Babolat AeroPro Drive rackets that i got new (grip size 4 & 1/2 with Willson overgrip). Imgur They’ve served me very well over the years. Im a heavy spin, occasionally loopy, style hitter. I like to put lots of action on the ball. I’ve never been great at generating my own powepace, so the 100 head size helps with that a bit. Have had challenges with consistency too. 6’2 but quite lanky and not built.
To the point: I was recently on vacation and hitting with a friend’s cheap amazon racket, and was finding unusual success in my consistency, pace, and feel during our rallies. I eventually concluded this was mainly due to a smaller grip size (4 and 3/8, no overgrip) which gave me more “whip” and feel/maneuverability with the racket. As well as loose, moving, trampoline-like strings that gave me some more powepop on my shots (I’ve got polly on my Babolats). Since that time, i’ve wanted to reproduce this with my own rackets, which has led me to the question, would it be possible to reduce the grip size from 4 & 1/2 to something like 4 & 3/8 or 4 & 1/4 ? If possible, would hopefully be most cost effective, rather than purchasing two new rackets. Initial googling hasn’t been conclusive, but it would appear that shaving down the grip may not be possible due to the grip’s material? Wanted to see if anyone had experience or knowledge with this.
Lastly, with racket demos being so convenient, i recently demo’d the latest Babolat Pure Aero (3/8) & to try and switch it up, Yonex EZONE 98 (3/8). In short, i really wanted to vibe with the Yonex and to be fair, it started out feeling pretty good with impressive control & feel, definitely hit some great serves off it, but it ended up causing some arm pain (a bit heavier and maybe vibration issues?) and over time had trouble generating the needed power and depth on my rallies. Whereas the latest Babolat Pure Aero (3/8) felt like home, but with enhancements. With the smaller grip size, i felt like my serves could snap more and my groundstrokes had the right amount of whip.
I’ve been considering doing another demo to check out Yonex VCore 98 or 100, and the latest Babolat Pure Aero 98 (drawn to the idea of a 98 although likely not practical for the amount I play and my lack of power). But when it’s all said and done, a new set of rackets is expensive, so trying to see if I can get by with modifying my old. Would there be any benefits to getting the latest and greatest spin oriented sticks from one of the big manufactures over what i have now?
Greatly appreciated for any insights with the questions or recommendations!
submitted by mike275ms to 10s [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:13 NotoriousAsmr_ ASMR Mic Triggers with Squishy Sticky Stress Balls [Intentional]

ASMR Mic Triggers with Squishy Sticky Stress Balls [Intentional] submitted by NotoriousAsmr_ to asmr [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:12 CyberSkullCoconut On "Whole Foods" Culture and Amazon. From a 10 year Team Member.

I had just finished watching this video after working for Whole Foods for 10 years. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qK2lNUVfmMQ Check out the comments on the video. It's almost all disgruntled WFM Team Members.
So many people have come and gone in my time here at Whole Foods. I had a friend ask me the other day when I saw the most people quit? Well it was definitely after it was announced that they'd cut the yearly Job Dialog's raise from 10-12% max, to a mere 3-4% max. Does that make you really want to put in the extra effort?
I know other seasoned Team Members who have been around longer than I have making a measly 40 cents or 60 cents on a yearly raise.
That's disgusting when the company is making so much money and still growing. But we're not allowed to share in those profits? https://www.supermarketnews.com/retail-financial/amazon-physical-stores-keep-double-digit-sales-growth-q3 I think the company uses and manipulates the people they can to do the hard labor. Usually those are full-time team members. I think it creates a dynamic between different workers where some are upset that others aren't "picking up the pace." Well what reason do you have to work hard? Shouldn't we just enjoy ourselves and the company of our fellow Team Members? Make work more of a fun and entertaining place since we're all stuck here so many hours a week?
It's why the company has had such a hard time finding anyone for management in stores and why so many quit. It's too much pressure to manipulate people. And the new people they find to be Team Leaders are becoming more and more unstable, toxic, rude, and don't respect Team Members. And many that stick up for their Team Members are told they're doing something wrong unless they follow protocol. (Aka Store Process)
Not to mention the number of "Visits" from Regional and Global to make sure everything is going the way they want it. And when everything is as they want it, then they find more for us to do. Nothing is ever enough.
I've even heard people from Regional say that they're consolidating their jobs. And that they've given them more work and more stress for no more pay. It's what happens to most of us regular Team Members on the day to day.
"Do more with less." "Figure it out." "You're the only one who knows how to do your job."
But the overall feeling I constantly see from fellow team members is depression, anxiety, and burn out. It's why so many people have left the company in my ten years. The power structure of this company used to operate differently as I've mentioned before, and I think those structures are what has poisoned the well and is what is making everyone so uncomfortable. It's the companies way or the highway. Sure, you can ask questions you can "give feedback" but all of that is just grievance procedure or "growing pains" for these companies.
As workers I feel like we used to believe we were able to have a reasonable say in our working conditions, and that made us care more about our work, our specific job and how it interacted with others, and of course helping our customers.
I was brought into this world of "Stakeholder Capitalism" in which everyone is supposed to have a say, especially workers doing the work. That is the Corporate PR image that Whole Foods used to run on and still does.
When I started at this company I was told that we didn't have TV commercials because they thought they'd rather put that money to better use for the Team Members. Instead now I see TV's inside of the Whole Foods playing our ads, and I see Amazon advertising their Amazon Prime Videos when I walk in.
We already are seeing massive layoffs in the tech sector, and we already are seeing the bringing in of self checkouts and smart checkouts across the country. And of course we're seeing Amazon open up their own grocery stores; Amazon Fresh using some of the same warehouses as Whole Foods.
Our Jobs aren't on the line yet, in fact we've been very fortunate the last couple of years because of the low unemployment, and a job market that favors workers. But with the Federal Reserve raising interest rates we're going to see these problems hit the retail sector soon.
All of this along with Albertsons and Kroger trying to merge into one company? That type of corporate consolidation is going to hurt all of us.
Please disclose your hourly rate to your fellow Team Members. That's the only way we are going to be able to fight back against this. They don't think most of us are going to be sticking around that long, and they know that so many other stores are hiring at $15 an hour now.
Amazon has scared the ever loving hell out all the STLs and ASTLs that the departments are not allowed to go over the labor budget. And their solution is to cut everyone's hours by 3 or 4 hours a week. We know damn well that's cutting money out of our pay as inflation is still a problem. The prices of living and food have gone up but our paychecks have not! Same with the prices of products in the store.
I've had coworkers tell me they went on leave for Covid-19, and they came back and products they make have gone up quite a lot.
Mentioning Covid-19, I'd love to hear how many of you GOT Covid-19 after the company took away the Covid PTO? Because I can count the number of people on both my hands in the store I work for. If we get roll over PTO, why not just have added the hours on, if we didn't get Covid-19 the first couple of years and didn't use it?
We also used to get bigger blasts of PTO at different times of the year. We also used to get "Free Lunch" or $5 for doing a good job at something. Why do we sit back while they take this all away and make our conditions worse?
We're getting back into the squeeze between holidays, and come the Super Bowl and Valentines day they'll be begging us all to do overtime. Then they'll say they don't have any hours for us to work again.
I'd say I don't understand how this company is run, but I think it's obvious. Money talks, but if we work together and were organized we could stop this entire company from operating. But they've out organized us. Talk to your coworkers. Work with them. Get to know them.
I just don't know why I don't see more people understanding that. If you're upset about how you're being treated speak up and organize with your coworkers. If your hours are being cut, speak up and organize. Please all of you. We have to make ourselves heard and I fear this upcoming recession is going to hit all of us very hard. And by then the company will have gained a lot more teeth and we'll be the ones who are all getting fired just simply for speaking up.
submitted by CyberSkullCoconut to wholefoods [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:10 Aquarel23 [CA] Dragon Ball box set Amazon.ca 130CAD

[CA] Dragon Ball box set Amazon.ca 130CAD submitted by Aquarel23 to mangadeals [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:07 Few_Veterinarian5066 HELP!! Amazon sent wrong gpu and refuses to give me a return

Recently I purchased a 4080 on Amazon. I had seen some stories about people getting rocks, no gpu, used gpu etc. So I was a little bit skeptical. None the less I purchased a gpu since it seemed like a good deal. I made sure to buy directly from Amazon and not at 3rd party. They send me the 4080 but there was a completely different gpu In the box! So I sent it back stating the wrong item was send with details. And now they're trying to not give me a refund. Just seeing if anybody had a similar experience, and if so what did you do to get your refund?
Edit: just got off the phone with my bank to dispute the charge. I need to fax proof thst I've contacted Amazon but hopefully thst gets the ball rolling. Will keep you updated. Any other tips are appreciated.
submitted by Few_Veterinarian5066 to pcmasterrace [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 01:07 Aquarel23 [CA] One Piece Box Set 1 Amazon.ca 143CAD

[CA] One Piece Box Set 1 Amazon.ca 143CAD submitted by Aquarel23 to mangadeals [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 00:21 bikenewbchi fuck AllianceRx / vent

It's been a week since my doctor's office requested AllianceRx to ship my Spravato. (Insurance had already authorized my upcoming doses).
today my appointment got cancelled because the pharmacy failed to deliver my doses despite constant follow-ups by the doctor's office.
I spent half my workday today talking to:
-Anthem, my insurance company (they only offer Spravato thru AllianceRX). I filed a grievance so they know that this is a crappy partnership.
-Spravato Cares (who told me that a missed dose is an adverse event that's escalated to the FDA). I complained to them that AllianceRX is dropping the ball on their patients
-AllianceRX to see what the fuck is going on there
I feel like any gains made in the past few weeks have been dented by the emotional rollercoaster that was today.
What other options do I have? I feel like I'm at the mercy of this incompetent pharmacy on when it decides to ship out my fucking medicine. Does an insurance company in any circumstances allow a different pharmacy delivery company even though they're contracted with AllianceRX?
This is week 5, so I'm down to a single weekly dose but I feel the SI coming back because of all this stress.
For now, the CS at AllianceRX said that my medication will be shipped out tonight. But will I experience a gap in treatments each month and need to repeat this process of calling them and begging every fucking time? This is not the first time it happened either. There was a one-week delay in starting my treatment because they didn't deliver on time.
Just needed to vent and see if I have any other options.
Thanks!
submitted by bikenewbchi to Spravato [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 00:11 NewlyRecruitedidiot Women, what do you do for work?

I’m a man, my girlfriend is 27, has 1 child and is currently working at an Amazon warehouse. She’s been stressing out a lot lately because she’s not sure what to do about pursuing a career. She doesn’t want to work at Amazon forever, she’s a nice person, little shy and doesn’t like to deal with people too much (at least in person), her work experience is mostly in call centers (debt collecting and insurance claims) but she doesn’t want to do debt collecting ever again. She’s also about 2-3 classes away from having her CNA certificate from a community college. She stopped pursuing it a couple years ago because she was a single mother and had to focus more on raising her son.
She just doesn’t have a clue on what to do with her life career wise right now and I want to be able to help her, but I can’t think of any jobs/careers she might like so I wanted to ask you all here what y’all do for work and if you’re a shy type and if you like what you do?
Any help or recommendations of jobs geared more towards shy folks or jobs that don’t deal with people (unpleasant people lol) in person too much would be greatly appreciated!
submitted by NewlyRecruitedidiot to women [link] [comments]


2023.02.03 00:01 Human-Reference-3220 How can I entertain my dog while she's on bed rest?

I have a 5 year old German shepherd who recently had a spinal injury. Her vets believe it's a herniated disk, but they're waiting for confirmation with an MRI before doing anything besides managing her pain.
She wasn't doing so good the first few days, she couldn't stand up and when she did, she couldn't walk properly because she couldn't move her back legs. We were told to keep her on strict bed rest in a crate because it's a very delicate situation, that she should only be allowed to get up to go potty.
It wasn't difficult to maintain the bed rest at first because she was in so much pain that even getting her to go potty was a whole show (we even had a few accidents in the crate). I guess the pain meds and fish oil I was told to give her have been doing their job because she's not struggling to get up anymore and can walk almost normally now, usually only slipping if she gets too excited and walks a little faster than she should.
However, while we're so happy she's feeling much better, she has a lot of energy and is very bored of being inside her crate. I talked to the vets and they insisted we have to keep her on strict bed rest, but she's starting to get stressed enough that she's itchy and scratching at herself a lot.
I keep trying to find games that can mentally stimulate her to keep some of her stress at bay but most of the things I find online require her to be standing or moving around. So far I've been using licking mats but they don't seem to be doing the job anymore, she'll be distracted for maybe 30 mins and will then immediately start scratching or sort of whining at me with every other exhale. I also filled one of her balls with her meals to sort of work as a kong but it's the same thing.
Since she's always loved playing fetch, I've been trying to sit in front of her open crate and we keep playing this back and forth with the ball but it's obviously not as tiring as actually having her run off to get the ball. Meaning we can play for an hour straight but she's still feeling anxious.
So if you've read all this and have any advice as to how I can keep her entertained without moving to manage her stress, I'd very much appreciate it.
(Also, sorry if there's any mistakes, English isn't my first language)
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2023.02.02 23:34 Longjumping-Sir8176 Bathtub stress crack

Hello,
I am looking for advice regarding this stress crack that developed on the bottom floor of my bathtub. I purchased this kit from Amazon (see link) and I’m hoping this will do the trick. However I did read many articles that drilling a hole at the end of each crack is recommended and I was wanting to know if it is? Please let me know any suggestions and/or alternatives to fixing this.
Video crack tub
Product
Photo crack
submitted by Longjumping-Sir8176 to homeowners [link] [comments]


2023.02.02 22:37 MelodyHoliday why are cake pops always round?

I've made cake pops before but I am having a dino themed birthday for my son and saw dino shaped silicone molds on Amazon.... if they're big enough, would I be able to use those for cake pops instead of balls?
submitted by MelodyHoliday to cakepops [link] [comments]


2023.02.02 21:28 PoundInternational66 Great Price! Otylzto Wool Dryer Balls 6-Pack {Amazon}

Great Price! Otylzto Wool Dryer Balls 6-Pack {Amazon} submitted by PoundInternational66 to BlackestFridayDeals [link] [comments]


2023.02.02 21:21 AllAboutThatMoney_ Is Debt Bad For Your Finances?

There’s a lot of debate out there about whether or not debt is bad for your finances. Some people say that it’s necessary in order to get ahead. While others believe that it’s something you should avoid at all costs. So, what’s the truth? Is debt bad for your finances? Here’s a look at both sides of the argument so you can make up your own mind.

What Is Debt?

Firstly, what is debt? Debt is an important part of personal finance. It’s important to understand the different types and how they can affect your finances. Debts are defined as money you owe to somebody else.
There are two main types: secured and unsecured. Secured debt is backed by collateral, such as a home or car, while unsecured debt is not backed by anything.

Why Do People Take On Debt?

People take on debt for a variety of reasons, including to finance a large purchase, consolidate other debts, or cover an unexpected expense. Some people also take on debt to invest in a business venture or to fund their education. Whatever the reason, taking on debt can help people achieve their financial goals.
However, it’s important to remember that debt is not without its risks. If not managed properly, debt can lead to financial problems. That’s why it’s important to understand all the terms and conditions of a loan before signing on the dotted line.

Credit Scores

Your credit score is one of the most important factors lenders consider when determining whether or not to approve a loan. A high credit score indicates to lenders that you’re a responsible borrower who is likely to repay your debts on time. A low credit score, on the other hand, could result in higher interest rates and make it more difficult to get approval for a loan.
There are a few things you can do to improve your credit score. This includes paying your bills on time, maintaining a good credit history, and using a variety of different types of credit. If you’re concerned about your credit score, there are a number of resources available to help you understand and improve it.
Read this post on the importance of credit scores.

Types Of Good Debts And Bed Debts

There are different types of debt, some of which can actually be beneficial to your financial situation. Then there are some types of bad debts that have the potential to make your financial situation much worse. We’ll take a look at a couple of examples of good debts and bad debts below.

Good Debts Examples

Good debt is typically characterized as debt that is used to purchase something that will appreciate in value or generate income. We’ll look at a couple of good debts examples below.

Home Loan

A home loan is a good type of debt because it is an investment in your future. A home is an asset that will appreciate over time, so you are essentially borrowing money to make an investment that will pay off in the future. Additionally, the interest you pay on a home loan is tax-deductible, so you can save money on your taxes.

Business Loan

Assuming the business loan is used for business purposes and not personal expenses, a business loan can be a good type of debt because it can help a business expand, hire new employees, or buy new equipment. The purpose of a business loan is to help a business grow and the benefits can be seen in the form of increased revenue and profits.

Bad Types Of Debts

Debts that are considered “bad” are typically high interest and are not secured by an asset. This type of debt is bad for your finances because it can be difficult to keep up with the payments and the interest can quickly add up. This can lead to financial stress and can even put you at risk of defaulting. What is debt default? Defaulting is where you are unable to pay back the money you borrow.
Bad debt is when you spend money on something that doesn’t increase in value and doesn’t generate income. For example, buying a new car that depreciates in value as soon as you drive it off the lot is bad.

Bad Debt Examples

There are a few characteristics that can make a debt “bad.” If the debt has a high interest rate, is difficult to repay, or is associated with a risky investment, it may be considered a bad debt. Additionally, if the debt is from a source that is not reputable or trustworthy, it may also be considered bad.

Credit Card Debt

There are a few reasons why credit cards can be a bad type of debt. The first reason is that if you don’t pay your credit card balance in full each month, you will be charged interest on the outstanding balance. This can add up quickly and make it difficult to pay off your debt.
The second reason is that if you miss a payment or make a late payment, you will be charged a late fee. This can also add up quickly and make it difficult to pay off your debt.
The third reason is that if you max out your credit card, you will be charged an over-limit fee. This can also add up quickly and make it difficult to pay off your debt.
However, if used responsibly, credit cards can be a valuable tool to build credit history and earn money. For example, if you pay your credit card balance in full each month, you will not be charged interest. Additionally, if you use a rewards credit card to make purchases that you would otherwise pay for with cash, you can earn rewards points that can be redeemed for cash back, gift cards, or travel.

Payday Loans

Payday loans are a type of short-term, high-interest loan that is typically due on the borrower’s next payday. They are a bad type of debt because they have high interest rates and fees, and can trap borrowers in a cycle of debt. Borrowers should avoid them because they can be very expensive and can cause financial problems. Learn why payday loans are bad.

Is Debt Consolidation Bad?

Debt consolidation is the process of combining multiple debts into a single loan. This can be done by taking out a new loan to pay off existing debts, or by transferring balances from multiple credit cards to a single card. But is debt consolidation bad for your finances?
There is no single answer to the question of whether or not debt consolidation is bad. It can be a helpful tool for some people in getting their finances under control. However, it can also be a risky move that can lead to further financial problems. It is important to carefully consider all the pros and cons before deciding if debt consolidation is right for you.

Should You Avoid Debt?

There is no easy or straightforward answer to the question of whether or not you should avoid all debt. On one hand, it is possible to live a life without ever borrowing money or accruing any debt.
However, for most people, this is difficult to do and may not be realistic. Additionally, there are certain types of debts that are often necessary in life, such as student loans or a mortgage. While it is possible to avoid all debt, it may not be practical or possible for many people.
That being said, there are certain types of debts that you should avoid if at all possible. These include high-interest debts, such as credit card debt, that can quickly spiral out of control. Additionally, you should avoid taking on debt for unnecessary purchases, such as a luxury car or a vacation.
If you do need to borrow money, make sure you do so for a valid purpose and that you are able to repay the debt in a timely manner.

Conclusion — Is Debt Bad?

So, is debt bad for your finances? As we can see with the aid of good debt and bad debt examples above, debt is not necessarily a bad thing. It can help you finance important purchases and help you reach your financial goals.
However, it is important to be aware of the risks associated with debt. You should make sure you are able to repay your debts in a timely manner.
Published at; https://allaboutthatmoney.com/2023/02/02/is-debt-bad-for-your-finances/
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2023.02.02 21:17 Excuse_station Crisis story

I wanted to share my Addison’s crisis story on this forum in the even that it’s of interest to others with our condition. After writing this story I struggled with how best to get it out there because of its length and decided to experiment with Amazon Kindle. If you’re interested based on the teaser but don’t use Kindle or care for Amazon, message me an email and I’ll send you a PDF (the point is to share the story, not make a buck).
Amazon link: https://a.co/d/hi6v0Rp Stats: 10,000 words/43 pages.
“Crisis in Juneau” story description
Crisis in Juneau follows a novice rock climber who joins two pros on attempt to make the first ascent of a mountain face in southeastern Alaska. Their plan is to pack three weeks of food into sea kayaks and paddle seven days from Alaska’s capital of Juneau to the base of a mountain that rises six thousand feet out of the water. It’s the trip of a lifetime, but it culminates in a near-fatal disaster before they really get started.
While training for the trip, the author has a sense that something is wrong with his body, but he stubbornly ignores clues that point a serious malady and convinces his two climbing partners that he'll be well soon. What he doesn’t know is that he is in the final stages of Addison’s disease, a rare autoimmune condition in which the body kills its own adrenal glands. The progression of the disease is slow and subtle. It can take years to fully manifest and often goes unnoticed and undiagnosed until an urgent medical crisis is triggered by stress. There is stress aplenty as the three prepare for the trip, and things come to a head after they have packed up their kayaks and paddled out to sea to climb their mountain.
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